Google?

I get a lot of readers in just a couple of minutes seemingly looking for old entries in Google. Where people suddenly get the time to listen to everything I say, I don’t know. But it’s great to have so many readers, isn’t it? I wonder whether they’ll actually look into it. Else, just stick to my screenwriting advise. Become a better screenwriter.

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Okay, let’s be honest here. Who’s looking up all the posts? Comment.

So many readers, so little to say… Okay, screenwriting teachers.

You’ve heard of them, the gurus, God bless their souls.

I’ve had my work analyzed by one of Hollywood’s top analysts. Good grades all-round on a comedy and tragedy. A classical portfolio. So what do I have to say about teachers?

I stick to Lajos Egri. Listen to Syd Field, and you’re not really allowed to say anything in dialog. Or, “It should move the story forward.” Everything should. Syd is terribly behavioristic. So is Robert McKee, in a sense. Your characters should do this or that.

Syd would say action equals character, so what you say doesn’t mean anything? Or is speaking just another form of action?

Truth be told, if you’re methodical, and you stick to his method, you’ll most probably end up with something of a proper screenplay. Methodical people don’t stick to rules. So whenever they mention them, it’s a sorta-rule. My problem with Syd’s work, is that I listen to him.

Robert than, would for instance say, that people see other people in terms of what’s being said about them. I don’t think that holds true. It may allow them to team up against stronger people, but they’ll still see them as a threat. If they weren’t, why lie?

Screenwriting teachers are as good as they stick to sound fundamentals. Fundamentals are everything. That’s what you learn in art. First you learn the fundamentals, then you think there’s much more to it, and in the end, you have nothing left but the fundamentals.

Lajos Egri sticks to the fundamentals. If you learn the fundamentals, and define your screenplay as such, you’ll have no problem writing a proper play.

So screenwriting teachers? Or gurus? Be wary of anyone that’s called a guru. There’s no mysticism to anything, so the term guru should never apply.

When you listen to the recommendations, you will for instance get something like, such-and-so producer thinks this is a great book. Well, I’m sorry, but writers write, producers don’t.

Or William Goldman attended Robert’s seminar. Cool. How did he feel about it?

I mean, recommendations are recommendations. Even with good grades all-round, I still had to fix things. But the good grades all-round I made. They are physical.

So forget about the metaphysical. Forget about who attended. Forget about the gurus. And stick to sound fundamentals.

Can screenwriters learn from Confucianism?

“Sex sells!”, is probably the number one phrase, followed by some treatise of artistic freedom, or how it’s functional to the story. If it isn’t bad enough, that the director has to say these things, it’s worse to see a somewhat introverted actor or actress defend their actions. People that are above thirty typically are more comfortable with their bodies, but even then you might wonder whether we really need it.

A good story sells itself, it doesn’t need any gimmicks. This raises the question of what is good. I’m not a Confucianist personally, but for now, as an angle, let’s see whether Confucius might have a thing or two to say about writing a screenplay.

Confucius did study the arts, but all I have to go by right now is his treatise on morals, conduct, learning, and more, captured in the Analects (or in Chinese Lun Yu). The Analects is a title derived from the Latin word analecta. This means, the slave, that gathers the breadcrumbs after dinner. It is composed of the sayings his pupils collected after his lectures, like breadcrumbs after dinner.

Confucius preached a return to morals.

Not every rule that was ever captured, naturally is a good rule. A rule doesn’t necessarily reflect a proper moral. Morals themselves can even be wrong.

Some rules of the old Hollywood system, the Hays Code, might be considered good, whereas others clearly weren’t. For instance, nudity wasn’t allowed in Hollywood movies, thus safeguarding the actors involved in shooting pictures, and forcing the system to focus on sound storytelling. On the other hand, it also disallowed interracial couples to appear in movies. As long as the man doesn’t have sex with the dog, then why shouldn’t this be allowed?

I personally feel, saying that there are different races of people, is baloney.

These weren’t necessarily the rules Confucius would teach. He would say, for instance, that learning is the highest virtue. From Latin, we learn, that the goal of art is to teach or to entertain. So Confucius would rule out entertainment, or Hollywood as a whole.

To entertain is a highly moral virtue, because the merits of labour can come in different ways. For instance, your back might be cramped. And what better than a good movie to relax it?

A lot of people think back to the Golden Age of Hollywood, and wish things were the way they were back then. That’s much more like Confucius, because Confucius didn’t favor a reinterpretation of classical morals, but sticking to them rigidly, even in terms of classical customs.

Confucius failed on two accounts: his rigidity caused people that sought a more fluid way of life to stir, and overthrow his system; and he didn’t take into account external influences.

Confucius got dismissed from court, when a neighboring ruler became jealous of the ruler he supported, and how well he was doing. The neighbor sent over liquor and dancers to distract him, and break with Confucius’ high morals.

It worked. Confucius got fired, and the province was led in disarray by its monarch.

Hollywood was very much focused on maintaining its system during the Golden Age as well. It not only comprised production companies, but also owned the theaters, disallowing virtually anyone to break into the system, or so it seems.

When you look at all of the people that broke into moviemaking, with one of my personal favorites being Robert Riskin, there were certainly some vagabonds there. From rags to riches, was something the Hollywood system supported.

Hollywood’s system fell, because of the package deals, that are still used today, to sell bad books, DVD’s and CD’s, in combination with one at least moderately good one. It fell, because it forced the theaters to buy these package deals. They had no other choice.

Hollywood’s system didn’t fall, because of the way movies were produced. It fell because of how they were sold.

But this also means, that during the Golden Age of movie making, a lot of bad movies were released, much like they are today. All the same, every era only remembers a couple of movies, for how good they really are. In the end, it isn’t the system, but the people within it, that make it great, or make it fail.

Confucius assumed that a system in itself, could force people to behave properly. It can’t. The system can limit people in what they can do, and as such you can force screenwriters, that subject actors to their antics, to write screenplays, that are morally shootable.

Can screenwriters learn from Confucianism? If you take it literally, they’d better not. But then again, if you don’t think about things, why be a screenwriter?

If you think about what it says, and learn to place it in a proper modern context, Confucianism can teach you things. But you’ll also soon realize, Confucianism could learn a thing or two on morals from you too.

Do I really know what I’m talking about?

I like to do my research, and I like to think I know what’s going on. And I always feel I do, yet sometimes I have to admit I don’t. I guess that’s why they call us schmucks. Cause we always think we’re right.

Where am I at? Here’s some recent feedback:

Hello, this story is a little too widespread to appeal to a broad audience. Without appeal to the masses, it would be difficult to justify the budget for a film like this, and as such, I have to pass at this time. Thanks for submitting, and best of luck to you.

So much for that screenplay. Or maybe someone else will like it. The budget isn’t as big as it may seem at first sight. But it’s true. It is pretty big. So do I really know what I’m talking about?

I’m not going to quote anyone here. But those that did their homework, know whom to quote on knowing things in Hollywood. Let’s just say I favor subtext.

I’m now working on a different screenplay. A bank robber. A son raised in private schools. Robbing a virtual bank. If I’d be a producer I’d like it. But do I really know what I’m talking about?

Of course I do. I know everything. I’m a screenwriter. Who are you to ask me?

Anyway. I need to get back to writing. And for those that read this blog, without looking for the WME mailroom, well, here’s finally another post for you.

The one thing I would change about the United States (or any other country)

Okay. So I want to move to the United States. Is that a good idea? A lot of companies have gone bankrupt. People are out of a job. Or maybe things are picking up again?

How do you “pick up” an economy as a whole?

One of the main problems I witness in the United States, was actually solved a long time ago by Hollywood.

What I’m about to say, actually goes against everything I believe in. I like the organization of the old studio system, with the studios churning out scripts and movies all the time. I can see the beauty of that. But there is one major flaw, that Hollywood didn’t get room for to experience. A flaw that couldn’t arise due to the end of the classical studio system.

Cut to Detroit.

Detroit used to be a lush and beautiful city. It now is again, for as far as I can tell. But there has been some in between. Crime rates now drop steadily.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but Detroit once went bankrupt as the automobile industry did. When Ford “disappeared”, most people packed their bags. I’ve heard someone say, they looked at their luxurious mansions, and realized they weren’t worth anything anymore.

The whole of Detroit depended on Ford. Ford and Detroit couldn’t exist without one another. Times seem to have changed, but it’s still something worth noting.

Detroit, by the looks of it, has one of the smartest city councils, any city in the United States has. That’s something to be proud of. My personal opinion is that it took a bankruptcy to get them there. Anyone looking to get on the city council before, may have hoped to get there based on money. These people were chosen based on need, with no other competition, simply because there wasn’t any money to get.

It’s good these people are there. Still I wonder. What could have saved Detroit, before anything bad happened to it?

Detroit could have been saved by the current model of the movie industry. A synergetic system of a few big companies, supporting a whole lot of distributed “independent” smaller ones, that compete for funding.

The free market place and honest competition is a beautiful ideal. But without an industry insider referee like, say, Warner Bros., how do you know what smaller production companies can keep working? How do you know which ones should grow out into bigger ones?

Look at the old studio system. They produced some of the best movies ever made, but they also sold a whole lot of B-movie material, packaging them with hot material, like they still do with DVD-collection sets. This isn’t illegal, but if it becomes the system, rather than a unique packaging deal, it may provide problems.

Quality should be the measure. Not just that it sells. For proper competition, you should consider what sells. Not enforce that it sells.

When you look at Detroit and Ford. Ford was very much geared toward, that it sells. So was GM. These were major industrial players that some locations were entirely dependent on. When such an industry, or an industry player, goes bankrupt, that’s the end of it. The location goes bankrupt too.

When you have a lot of independents, that either produce low budget movies on their own schedule, or produce bigger budget movies supported by major studios, competition gets on its way. The bigger studios need to consider quality, rather than quantity. Quality now sells.

Couldn’t you do the same thing for other industries?

In a sense this is already happening. Check the Discovery channel. Custom made cars. Custom made motor cycles. And when these smaller companies do well, some of their bikes and cars get made through mass production.

Mass production is a different industry, that requires different standards. The cars need to be produced without too many subtleties. Therefore, they need to be somewhat quaint. But these relatively quaint models in turn, help finance the not so quaint models.

The one thing I would, maybe not change, but like to see stimulated, is the distribution of the industry. Meaning that bigger companies typically take care of the financing. And the smaller ones of the production. With any measure of companies in between, that do a bit of both. Not just for movies. But for all industries.

Etiquette and Hollywood

I worry too much. And perhaps I could have used a bit more support when I was younger in being allowed to behave the way I do. I worry about etiquette. But when I study it, I just bought another book, it just says, behave the way you do by nature.

People don’t like it when I keep my back straight. I need to relax.

Study etiquette. What does it say? Keep your back straight. Call me lame, but I feel comfortable that way. When moving, I keep it small. I don’t behave big by nature. And that’s fine. I feel perfectly comfortable. If you feel I’m a stiff, be my guest. I feel I just don’t need that much movement.

But is it all that important?

Yes, I think so. When you look at Hollywood, querying, writing, receiving criticism, with the way some people deal with it, a bit of etiquette wouldn’t hurt. Why? Equality. Deserving a chance. Giving people a chance.

If you don’t stick to etiquette, if you forget about formalities, someone is going to get left out. Say a lot of bad things about someone behind his or her back, don’t allow this person to be considered for the actual actions undertaken by this person, and there you have it… Not a drop-out, but a left-out.

It’s easy enough. And it’s easy enough to then look at this person, now breaking with etiquette, out of frustration, and say, there, that’s not according to etiquette. That’s the way it goes.

So, stick to etiquette. Give people a chance. And judge them by their actions. Support them if they do right. It sounds easy enough, doesn’t it?

To Inktip or not to Inktip

I InkTip. Do you InkTip? I do. But I’m thinking about what you need to consider if you want to. Having your screenplay up there is a difficult thing. Why?

Today, nobody’s buying.

Maybe, tomorrow someone will check it and they will. Maybe. Or should I replace this screenplay with a different one? If this one didn’t do anything for a month? That’s no time in Hollywood, for those that didn’t know that yet. Or is it? Maybe I should pick a different one.

Maybe it was just the logline. Or was it the synopsis, that killed it? Who says it’s dead anyway? Some screenplays just take time.

You need to fix the logline and the synopsis, before you put it up there, okay? Just so you know. Fix first. Upload later. That goes for all selling. Fix first, upload later.

So now I “finished” my high concept bing-battadang screenplay. Okay, so I need to read it for typos once more. Okay, so the main character does have character to him, something about his wife… No, he isn’t divorced. Anymore, anyway. They’re back together again. Sort of. But a good high-concept screenplay does that. Or has that. Character.

It uses the same archetype as “Taken”, but it isn’t.

I have a ticking clock. And an abduction. But he saves her before the end. And then there’s still the brother. Cause her brother really is the problem. And the CIA. And terrorism. And… And… And…

What I’m trying to say is, it isn’t “Taken”. But next to having good characters, it does go Bing-Battadang, with a capital B, in capital Berlin.

And it’s like that with InkTip. But then it’s more… … Because uploading doesn’t make that much noise. You just have the timing constraints. The ticking clock. And what can I throw at them next.

So if you decide, InkTip is what you do, make sure you have your screenplay ready. Preferably not just one. Cause it needs to hit. And if the one doesn’t, you may consider replacing it by the next.

Or maybe you shouldn’t.

Seven pitfalls for new writers

Why seven? Cause it’s manageable. I figured I’d just get around to writing down seven mistakes I’d wish I hadn’t made. But then again, maybe everyone just has to go through these. I’ve numbered them, but read them in any order of preference.

1. Self-publishing, hoping to be found: People aren’t going to find your book. Self-publishing only works for good self-help books, or books that have a steady fan-base in terms of family and friends, before they get published. And you know how to market it. If you know up-front you have two thousand readers, by all means, self-publish. Have people comment on it. Then approach a publisher. Maybe you don’t even have to do this to hit some best-sellers list. Just don’t expect anything, or hope for anything, by just putting it out there. Self-publishing is made way too easy to begin with.
2. Learn to write based on books producers like: Producers are managers. They like to delineate. Put in boxes. Store. Move on. Screenplays aren’t manageable. They are creative endeavors, that take love, tears, time, hatred, and much more. Stacking the box with text, with one turning point here and there, isn’t going to work. Your screenplay is turning all the time. It isn’t about just one turning point, it’s about continuous movement. Ever going forward. Continuous exposition. If it doesn’t move forward. If it doesn’t reveal anything, or clearly leads to a revelation. Delete it. Writers write. Producers produce. Listen to what books writers recommend.
3. Send it out, before you have your marketing package ready: Even if they request your screenplay. If you need to register it still, register it first. It will take you a couple of days. A week, maybe. It took the producer time to get back to you. A couple of days more, for you to get things into working order, really isn’t going to hurt. Just don’t take months. Don’t explain it to them. Just get the final tidbits into working order, then send it to them. But hey, you prepared all of this up front, even before querying a producer, so this doesn’t apply to you. Right?
4. Say your screenplay is ready, when you have a specific doubt: When in doubt, fix it. That’s the only solution to the perfect screenplay. And it’s going to take you a very long time to get the first proper draft. It’s going to take thirteen or so rewrites. And you’ll write many more screenplays in between. It hurts. It sucks. But that’s the way it goes. Nobody’s born a writer with skills. Acquiring skill takes time.
5. Write shallow dialogue, because you’re not allowed to say anything: Either write specific dialogue, or don’t write anything at all. Nobody’s waiting for a punch-line. Characters have past lives, with the characters around them. They know things about each other. Attack each other with it. But things have changed as well.
6. Make your screenplay completely vertical: Alternate longer and shorter paragraphs. Change the rhythm. This will help the reader stay focused. And that’s what you want them to be. Single lines all the time will make your screenplay look like a very long shopping list. Shopping lists aren’t snappy. They are boring summations.
7. Believe everything you find out on the web: Especially the ten things-lists. They are usually copied straight from a book a producer likes. You can’t summarize everything in a fixed number of bullets. So don’t consider even this list to be complete.

Hope this helps. Feel free to post your own problems, if you have any.

High concept

Minimum explanation. Maximum action. Staying with the main character. Focusing on the main storyline. It’s a different thing, from what I’m used to. Normally I write multiple storylines. Not just that. High concept stories have a little of that too. But I give them room to breathe.

And here we are. Action, action, action. Boom-battabing-say what-battadang. I feel like a cheap car salesman. But it’s a hard thing to do. And it isn’t cheap.

You can’t just have action and punch lines. You need to have character in there too. But it’s much more subtle. And that makes it harder to do.

Adrenaline. Need to keep it pumping. Break out of the police station. Almost get shot. Where is she? What happened to her brother? What’s going on? Dodge the car! Dodge the car!

It’s exciting. I’m having fun.

I can stop being scared now

Sort of. Things happening in real life still scare me, sadden me, do things to me. But I don’t have to check twice behind my curtain. I finished writing my horror screenplay, and am glad the way it turned out.

The past days, weeks, you might say, I’ve had trouble sleeping. Maybe I won’t have sweet dreams. But I’ll have good dreams. About sweet people. Rather than scary ones.

I’m pleasantly surprised by the way it turned out. I wasn’t expecting that at all up front.

Writing horror screenplays isn’t my thing. Ghosts and ghouls get into my dreams. It’s easier to write “real” screenplays. Those can get nasty too. I wrote a story that had a game called, “Spot the kebab” in it. The idea being that soldiers in Afghanistan, or CIA-personnel, try to spot the suicide bombers, before they blow themselves up, and take them out.

That’s disgusting.

But I can’t imagine it behind my window. I can imagine ghosts, even though I know they don’t exist. I don’t think that’s weird. It’s the whole suspension of disbelief kind of thing they like to slap us around with. Us writers.

Usually there’s nothing not to believe in what I write. I just apply Murphy’s law. And there you have it. Reality.

In case of a horror screenplay, I suppose what makes it scary, is that the things that happen, can, largely, in real life. Through some character. As long as you treat your ghosts and ghouls as characters, they act as a metaphor to everything and everyone around us. Sometimes, inside of us. Not now.

I’m not completely finished. There’s still the synopsis. The four pager. That kind of thing. But I don’t have to dream about what will happen next. All of the ghosts are gone. All of the personal problems solved. The work is done.

Goodnight.